Today Is Your Life
June 9, 2016

In the past two weeks I have sat on the periphery of two heartbreakingly tragic and unexpected deaths. Deaths that have left permanent gaping holes in the hearts of people I love. Death has always served as a bit of a wake-up call. We all say “you could get hit by a bus tomorrow” but deep down don’t really think it will happen. So we take the day for granted. We take our relationships for granted. We complain about things that don’t matter like the traffic and Monday mornings. We wait. We wait for the next best thing, for this to settle down or that to work out. We live in the past and the future and not in this moment.

Although this quote is more negative than the ones I usually gravitate towards, it just rings such truth to what I am trying to convey today:

“We are all going to die, all of us, what a circus! That alone should make us love each other but it doesn’t. We are terrorized and flattened by our trivialities. We are eaten up by nothing.” - Charles Bukowski.

So today I’m reminding you:

  • Every ordinary day is a miracle and these ordinary days are the entirety of your life.
  • You can choose right this second to be both feet in, fully present in these moments.
  • You can change your mood by putting on a great song, going out for a walk, or doing something kind for someone else.
  • Choose forgiveness and hold on for dear life.
  • Assume the best of everyone and experience that freedom.
  • Appreciate every second you get to spend with the people you love.
  • Go do that thing you’ve always wanted to do. Do it now. Sign up for it today.
  • Stop hating on the bits of yourself you don’t like. Believe that you are freaking awesome and carry that confidence around in the world.
  • We leave behind our art and our love. So find your craft. And spread kindness, compassion and love like confetti at a wedding, in every interaction.

I know my words are nothing more profound than something else you ventured across in your daily facebook scroll, but I implore you to stop and listen, reflect and act. As much as we think we are entitled to grow old, the Universe doesn’t always work that way. Find the extraordinary in today. Today is your life.

With all my love to those deep in grief, you know who you are.

Christina

By Christina Henderson June 4, 2025
Stay tuned: Fall 2024 Clients and community members will be invited to share their art- on what it means to be human, to suffer and to heal.
long wooden bridge pathway in a lush forest representing the feeling of wading through anxiety and depression
By Christina Henderson June 4, 2025
I often struggle with the concept of clinical diagnosis, in particular the common ones in our culture: anxiety and depression. My issue is simple: we too often take normal and valid feelings, that are part of the human experience, then medicalize them as problematic. The response then is to “get rid of” rather than be curious about what these emotions are trying to communicate to us. I have my own experience with on-again, off-again depression. When it’s at its worst, I’d certainly meet clinical criteria: a sense of hopelessness, low mood and motivation, isolation, wanting to sleep a lot but finding it evasive, lack of enjoyment for anything I have loved. You know the drill. But when we start to untangle the why, really look deeply at the list of ingredients making up this soup of depression (or anxiety or other struggles), we begin to realize that these feelings, in fact, make perfect sense. And they are trying to communicate something to us that deserves a listen. Rather than banish the depression or ignore the anxiety, we need to dig a little deeper. And your unique blend of experiences, or your soup (if you will), will help you figure out what you need to do to take care of yourself better. In my case, depression is almost ALWAYS trying to tell me I’m burnt out. It is the only part of me that will put me to bed, remove all pressure for productivity or replying to messages or emails. It wants or needs nothing from me except rest. Clients I work with might notice their depression is driven by underlying shame, or by feeling lost or stuck in their life. They might be carrying grief from losses not yet named or processed. Anxiety too- the world is a scary place right now, and we are so overly exposed to global and local traumas. Perhaps you didn’t feel safe in childhood and that fear has been carried in your body in your adult life. Perhaps you really are in an unsafe situation and your fear is trying to communicate this lack of safety to you. What I am trying to say is… A diagnosis of depression or anxiety does nothing to improve our well-being on a deeper level. We must become detectives of our own suffering. Only then can we learn to move with more self-compassion and grace, to set boundaries when needed, to let go of what we cannot control, to figure out what specialists we may need to see, to rest when we need to, to grieve the losses of our lifetime, and to feel the fears of uncertainty that we all face, every single day. This is where counselling helps. This is what we do. We help you untangle the mess, learn your ingredients, heal what needs to be healed so you can do what you need to do to feel better. Or to simply be with yourself more kindly when it hurts. Sending love,  Christina
woman reads a book and drinks tea learning about surviving love and loss
By Christina Henderson August 3, 2023
“To be human is to survive love and loss.” – Francis Weller
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